Thanksgiving

Psalm 100:4 "Enter into His gates with thanksgiving, And into His courts with praise, Be thankful to Him, and bless His name"

Isn't it appropriate that Thanksgiving is the first holiday of the "season" that ultimately ushers in the New Year? I mean, what better way to reflect on the past year and start thinking about the year ahead than by giving thanks.

I have so many things to be thankful for. So many things that I take for granted day-to-day that I do not deserve. First and foremost, God's love for me and Jesus dying on the cross. Without Him I am nothing and could not do half of what I do.

I'm thankful for my boys and the great kids that they are.

Although Zachary pushes me straight off the steepest end of the cliff sometimes, he is a light to my world. A good snuggle buddy and champion wrestler (I loose every time). He is smart and loves to tell stories. I am very afraid of what he tells at school..LOL! And words cannot express how proud I am of Joseph. He's a leader and very much his own person. Even his teachers tell me that. What they also tell me is that he is a good kid and adored by everyone. He makes good choices most of the time, and honestly, other than a little smart mouth every now and then, does not give me trouble. I love them both so much and couldn't imagine my life without either of them.

I am thankful for my job and the ability to provide for my family. I couldn't ask for a more lenient boss that is flexible, approachable, and more than fair on most occasions. Although we have to remind him sometimes that he is not perfect, I believe that God knew Logan is who I would need to work for at this moment in my life and He went before me to make that provision.

I am very thankful for great friends!!! There are too many to name and they are ALL very important to me. Accountability partners, prayer warriors, and just plain fun gals! I am very blessed to have them all and appreciate them very much.

I'm thankful for my family and miss them terribly sometimes. They are crazy, dysfunctional and quite hilarious! What I love most, though, is that they genuinely love each other and they love God. We have such a good time when we all get together. One of my favorite things that we don't do often enough anymore is when we gather together and sing. Hopefully we will have time to do that at one of our holiday gatherings.

I'm thankful for the opportunity that God gave me to right some wrongs of my past. The biggest being finishing college....ask me how THANKFUL I am to be graduating in a couple of weeks :o)!

God has taken me on an incredible journey this last year. While I don't have everything that I want, and my heart sometimes longs for things to happen much quicker than they do, I am thankful that I have everything that I need. I am thankful that God didn't give up on me. My heart overflows with gratitude because I can clearly see where He has brought me from...believe me, it wasn't pretty. While I don't know exactly where He is taking me to (and I really hope it involves a Prince Charming), I know that His plan is perfect, which makes me very thankful the He is in control of my future.

Distraction

I want to start this post by revisiting my previous post. I want to clarify that I am still friends with this person and that there are no hard feelings between us. I am not struggling with rejection of any kind but rather exactly what I talked about, knowing God's plan.

Sometimes we get into the mentality that we have heard from God, but in reality we are trying to make things happen that we think will make us happy. The things that are going to satisfy us at that moment. But the reality is, is that they are not God's plan.

Our enemy wants nothing more than to distract us from the call that God has on our lives. Satan will do everything that he can to keep us from fulfilling that calling, especially where our thoughts are concerned. When we are consumed with a situation or circumstance or emotion our focus isn't on God and where He is leading us.

1 Peter 5:8 says that the devil walks around like a lion seeking those that he can destroy. What better way to "destroy" us than to attack our minds and take our focus off of the things of God.

If he can keep me thinking about my situations and circumstances or the things that I desire (a godly man) then he can keep me from thinking about the good things that God has already done and the places that God is leading me.

Have I been distracted? Absolutely! But my hope and trust is in the Lord and I will "be sober, be vigilant" and "resist him" (the adversary) becuase my God who is of all grace has called me to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus. And once this trial is over He will perfect, establish, strengthen and settle me (1 Peter 5:10).

When the Answer is No

I am loving our Bible study, Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl, and one of the lessons this week was exactly what I needed! What do we do when God hurts our feelings (in my case says "no")?

I have a friend that I would like to be more than friends with (anyone ever been there?) but he is not interested. I have prayed about it, over analyzed every conversation we have had, tried to get him to notice me as more than just a friend, discussed it with my friends, you name it....but the answer is no. My feelings are very hurt. Not from rejection by this person, but more because I don't see God's bigger picture. He is telling me that for right now I cannot have what my heart is longing for....companionship, help, love...all the things that I have ever desired in a relationship but have never had.

But just like we see the bigger picture for our kids and try to teach them and keep them from getting hurt, God is doing that with me. I don't like it. Quite honestly, it stinks!  But I do trust God's plan for me (and for my friend). I know that God has something far better than I could come up with on my own (Ephesians 6:20 "Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us").

So I am going to take Lysa's advice from our Bible study and ask what instead of why. What Lord do you want to teach me in this situation, what Jesus do I need to work on and let You clean out so that I can make healthy choices where relationships are concerned? Hard questions, but ones that will no doubt serve well to move me closer to God and the plans that He has for me. And, hopefully a little closer to meeting my Prince Charming!

New Adventure in the New Year

I know that it is too early for new Year's resolutions, but I just can't contain my excitement about starting my masters degree program with Liberty University!

I have loved everything about King College and greatly appreciate the opportunity that they provided me to complete my bachelor's degree in business, and seriously considered moving forward with obtaining my MBA from them. However, as the time got closer for me to graduate and make a decision about what my next move would be, I began to feel unsettled with the MBA choice.

I really felt like God was telling me to pursue other options and even felt chastised a little because I had not asked Him if the MBA degree is what He wanted me to pursue. Even though I had already applied and been accepted to King's MBA program, I started looking for other options.

That is when I found Liberty University online.

From the moment I started looking into their programs I have felt peace. The school has good reviews, friends that have attended there have positive things to say, I watched their convocation on Sunday mornings, all very positive!! PLUS, they have many more options than an MBA.

I knew the Lord was leading me into some sort of Biblical studies, but also knew that I wanted have something that I could further apply to my current career. So, I chose their Master of Arts in Christian Leadership.

The closer January 16th gets, the more excited I become. It almost overshadows my graduation on December 16th!! I can't wait to study God's word in a classroom environment. Here is a list of the classes I am taking my first semester:

Introduction to Apologetics, New Testament Orientation, Old Testament Introduction, and Systematic Theology.

I haven't a clue what I am going to do with this degree when I am done. But I do know that God surely has a plan that is going to change my life and will keep drawing me closer to Him!

Finding Jesus - Finding Me

Jeremiah 29: 11-14
"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. I will be found by you, gather you from all the nations and from all that places where I have driven you, says the Lord, and I will bring you to the place from which I cause you to be carried away captive"

I am just going to tell you that the first part of that verse drives me crazy sometimes because it is not the words that I want to hear. I am a very determined person who has always had a plan and likes to know what is going to happen, when it is going to happen, how it is going to happen and the final outcome. This part of the scripture is calling me to place of much discomfort because it doesn't allow me to be in control. I like control.

But as I have analyzed (something that I tend to over do to just about everything) the happenings over the course of my life, I see the plans that God has for me. I don't know what the future holds, but somehow seeing where He has brought me from gives me peace about where He is taking me to. Whether I know exactly where that is or not.

One plan that I definitely know He has for me is to draw me into a closer relationship with Him. This where the other words of this passage speak to me.

The events that have happened in my life in the last few years caused me to take true inventory of how much I seek the Lord and the quality of time that I spend with Him. As I learned to truly seek the Lord and pray to Him, I really did find Him!

What a difference it has made in my life. I love Jesus like I never have before and truly want all that He has for me. I LOVE His word and how it speaks to me. I can't wait to spend time with Him each day and always search for more ways to include Him in my life.

I surely have been brought back from captivity. From  places that I went to because of my lack of trust in the Lord. My lack of good judgement. My need to be in control and not surrender to what God had for me.

But the only place I can imagine being, that is better than where I am right now, is where God is taking me.

Random

Last night and this morning I was feeling so overwhelmed with everything that has been happening the last few weeks. It also doesn't help that I am a woman and we are overly emotional sometimes, or the fact that our days have been filled with non-stop running from one event to another.....some days I feel like I have driven enough to have gone to SC and back!

My uncle Randy died unexpectedly, my stepmom's sister died (she had cancer), our dog was missing and we found him dead, one of the goldfish died (I admit the goldfish is probably not the best example, it's just that it is one more death), and Monday my best friend called to say that her dad who has Alzheimer's was not expected to live much longer (he died today).....

So much death and tragedy all in one time frame is just overwhelming. Whether expected or unexpected, death is never easy. Running from sun up to sun down certainly takes its toll, and we all know how crazy hormones can make us (men included...I don't know why y'all think you are exempt!).

This morning I was sitting and pondering things that have happened, all that was going on and the feelings of  insecurity rising up because of a situation that I don't have complete clarity on and just started crying. Life is just overwhelming sometimes! 

I opened my Bible to look for a scripture that might help me quiet the insecurity that was trying to make matters worse, and looked over to the page before the passage I wanted, and this is what it said....

"And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work" 2 Corinthians 9:8

Immediately I felt peace, and thanked God that even in the midst of this chaos and emotional breakdown and death He reminded me that His grace is enough. He will give me the grace to handle these circumstances and anything else that life might decide to send my way. He will be sufficient in all areas of my life (even crazy hormonal areas) and will equip me for the good work that He has planned for me.

I trust You, Jesus, and declare today that Your grace, is indeed, enough!

Good-Bye Woody

Last Tuesday Woody went off on one of his usual trysts, but never made it back home to us alive. We aren't really sure what happened but we think that he got hit by a car. This seems like the most mundane way for him to die considering all that we have been through with him.

Woody was a big baby of a dog....we would have surely been in trouble had we gotten him to be a watch dog....one bark and then he would have been the foe's best friend. He was so friendly and easy going. He got car sick almost every time we took him anywhere, so, he usually only got to go to the vet and back. Shortly after we got him (when he was about 6 wks old) we found out that he had Parvo. The vet said that he would die but we declared that he was going to live (in Jesus' name) and he did. Then we wanted to kill him because he ate EVERYTHING in the house.....thankfully he got over that stage and became the loveable mutt that just plopped down on the floor wherever we were at and watched us. We loved him and he loved us. He will be greatly missed.

I am very thankful that we found him. Both when he was a puppy and now that he has gone on to doggy heaven (I know, maybe not theologically sound to some people, but I choose to believe he will be in heaven when we get there). Our lives held little extra fun, a whole lot more love, and a bundle more chaos; and, I'm glad to know that (since he for whatever reason died) he is buried in the back yard rather than alone in a place where we would have never found him.

Matthew 5:4
"Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted"

Attitude Confessions Continued

2 Peter 1:5-7
"Make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to your goodness, knowledge; and to your knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love."

I felt so bad after the not-so-good start to our week. I felt myself caught up in the wrong attitude that "we just can't get it right, especially me". My example to the boys is the most important one they see. They act the way that I act, they talk the way that I talk. Quite often, I am ashamed to hear some of the things that they say and see ways that they act because I know that it came straight from me.

On Wednesday I pulled out a book to read, hoping that it would provide some word to calm this war going on within me about what a bad example I had been. The scripture above was in chapter one. When I read it, I felt peace that I hadn't felt all week.

See, God doesn't expect me to be the perfect example all the time. He expects me to keep trying and "add" to the things that He has placed in me. He gives me goodness, knowledge, self-control (which sometimes seems like a very small portion), perseverance, godliness, brotherly kindness, and love. But how much I add to these is up to me. When I mess up, these things aren't taken away, I'm just not adding much to them.

Lesson learned for me this week....I will not feel condemned when I fall short with my attitude and actions, but will remember the things that God has given me to handle the situation, and move forward adding to them rather than taking away.

Attitude Confessions

Galatians 5:19-22
"Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: ... strife, ...., fits of anger, ..., dissensions, divisions, ...and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law"

Let me just go ahead and say that there has not been much practice of the fruits of the Spirit around my house this week! Over scheduled momma and kids have not made for very good company....it seems that the least little things have set one or all of us over the edge, and it only takes one of us to get a bad attitude and the other two soon follow! Strife, fits of anger, dissensions and divisions have shown up too many times the last few days!

Maybe I should have been better prepared for this week...a friend asked me how they could pray for me this week. My answer was for them to pray that the boys and me would have good attitudes with each other and about the things that we needed to do this week. Sure fire way to be tested in this area.

But I INTEND to keep my covenant with the Lord. We will keep working on our attitudes and declare that these things have no place in our lives. Ecclesiastes 4:12 "Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not easily broken"