If I Throw Up Maybe I'll Feel Better

I know, not a very inticing name for a post, but this is exactly how I feel at this moment in my life. I have been fighting with Dan for so long I thought that I was prepared to take these final steps and end this crazy dysfunction, but it has been more emotional, stressful, and difficult than I thought. 90 days seems like a short time...June 18th will be here before I know it. I know that I am making the right "next step". I have no doubt that I am moving forward in the right direction....but that doesn't make it easy. I spent 17 years with Dan. While most of those years were spent in conflict, we did have good times. We do have two wonderful boys and there are memories that I will always cherish. He does have good qualities...no one is completely bad. I will continue to pray for him and hope that one day he will allow God to bring some healing and restoration into his life. I pray for God to continue to help me to change the things I need to change, too.