JoJo, Josephine, Josephino, Josepfanie, Jofess....no matter what we called him (and he is such a good sport about the deformities that we give to his name) Joseph holds a place tightly in our hearts, and moving him to college was no easy feat for this helicopter Momma (this title is a story for another day).
I think in the back of my mind the fact that Knoxville is just 45 minutes away buffered the reality that Joseph was about to move out. Well, that and that we hardly saw him anyway because (and I am sure most of you with teenage sons know what I'm talking about) the last place that a teenage boy wants to be is home. But, at the end of the day he still came home. He still called to tell me where he was and what he was doing. He called to tell me if he was staying at a friend's house or what time he would be home. I knew his schedule, knew the proximity of his location, and most of the time what he was doing. Now, I don't have a clue. This is worrisome for moms, or at least for this mom. (The joke at our house now is that I am not mourning Joseph being gone, but rather the loss of control - all my boys know me too well- haha).
It's not just that I don't know what he's doing or who he's hanging out with anymore, but also the worry about whether or not he will make the same mistakes that I made. I went off to college once, but was too immature to handle the responsibility. I don't need to elaborate on the repercussions of my bad choices during that time, or the regrets that I have that can never be changed....but, they ring in my mind....they cause me to wonder what choices he will make. Then I remember to think on those things which are true, which are lovely, which are of good report (Philippians 4:8)....the good choices that Joseph has already made (that are the complete opposite of choices I made at his age).
He has held a job (at times he had 3 jobs) since he was 14, and made a good reputation for himself as a hard worker, and a respectful young man. Since he worked in jobs related to hospitality I know who he worked for and others that he came in contact with. Not one person ever said anything negative to me about him, but rather gushed over what a great young man he is and how much they loved working with him.
His friend's parents have sent me messages telling me what a great young man he became and how they are both impressed with and proud of him. I haven't met one person who doesn't like him or have something nice to say about him. He has never been one to conform to what everyone else was doing, and he has moved away from close, long-term friendships when those friends started making poor choices. He is confident, smart (he took 8 college classes his senior year of high school), and far more mature than I was at his age.
He has been at UT for two weeks now (and I have finally stopped crying :)), started classes, and pledged a fraternity. I am worried, afraid, excited, and hopeful for him. I pray for him daily and miss him like crazy, but I firmly believe God has ordained this time for him. God will continue to direct his path...I trust that the Lord will continue the good work He began in Joseph, and He will see it to completion (Philippians 1:6).
And, like any good mom (and wife of a Vol4Life) I will wear the appropriate color of orange, yell, "Go Vols," and attend every event that Joseph will let me attend at Rocky Top.
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